Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Had a phone call conversation with Sh, someone i detest for her infinite stupidity and naivety about life and people. Worst of all, she is a gahmen supporter. She wanted to visit me in the UK and, of course, in my infinite loneliness, I gathered that talking to an idiot is better than talking to no one at all. Then she asked me whether I was real in the context of my academic abilities and this is of course, as everyone knows, a sore point with me. For a while, the movie, dinner distracted me, but once I returned to the isolation cell, I started brooding about her comments. To add insult to injury, the school mass mailed its congrats to two final year phd students who have been appointed lecturers by certain universities in the UK. Mediocrity. I am really scared of being mediocre. I need to prove to myself that I am not mediocre, I really need to do that. Soon.

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